With time she came so far,
that her face no longer remains a mirror of her heart.
She knows day by day she is losing every hope of being understood even by the people closest to her heart who are in her surroundings. As after her dreams got killed by having a constant demotivation by her closed ones from whom she expects the strongest moral support once, she no longer remains her. And this is how the journey begins of her no longer being able to find herself at peace as her passion always burns fire inside her and her heavy heart don't forgive her to be a loser and not allow her to be satisfactory even for a moment. She is in a battle from yesterday and today and will be until having the "peace of achieved" tomorrow.
Yes... in between all of this all she became is her today - A Stone heart / Weirdo / Useful for nothing. Can you even imagine? the burden of All these small, yet big labels. But she (a warrior like her) accepted being a loser until being a winner as she is a self-motivated person who can't sit doing nothing and being a loser in a true sense.
Well, A new her is no longer that sensitive but still the same passionate about "She Can Do A BIG" By doing a thousand smalls. As no matter her dreams (her destination's picture) are changed but her passion doesn't, she decided to speak her voice out for each minor or major thing and this is how her personal opinion take a bigger place to her above people from now onwards, for not to lose even a single opportunity of win in the path of her dream. So, Let Me introduce you all to- "Prutha".
Prutha, an ocean of emotions, love, anger, guts and honesty. But a serious face(lack of expression face) girl. And her serious face gifted her few undeserving labels too, of her, for being her, from a people who "Judge A Book by Its Cover".
Except all of this, deep down she is inquisitive about every little or big thing. And as she was growing up her curiosity took a strong place in her life that her path became focused and clear that such labels are not that big enough to be an obstacle yet being heavy and hard to deal with at the same time. But along with time her "opinion" also took irreplaceable place in her life to not to sacrifice over her principles, boundaries or dreams. And she has her own Point of View for everything that happens around her despite knowing all the obstacles she came through and she had to deal with what will come across to her. And she proud of her soul to be this gutsy today along with small and deep experiences to big and scary nightmares.
An observant her started speaking her voice out being bold and shameless if it is about a truth but day by day she started realising that - one's opinion does not always get appreciated, People might misunderstand you or not agree with you in case of their own loss as truth demands cost. So, instead of welcoming your viewpoints or taking it in a positive way people think/behave like - You are trying to prove yourself smarter than all of them, You understand yourself as intelligent only, or you think everything should be done as per your opinion only.
But she can see here that the only major thing is such behaviour of person/ people somehow turns into back-stepping one for not giving the "valuable" , the "important" point of view of an individual for a thing happening around them, happening to them and affecting them a bit or more.
And after witnessing all such incidents again and again she get tired that she reached to a phase, where she doubted that, If... one's opinions not getting a good welcoming approach and if it turns into a rude arguments more often then why one should not keep it to her/himself and speak it out no matter if it is good for not only but for all. If her voice is not getting valued by another person then why not let him or her pay the cost of their decision and keep her mouth shut , why not to save the senses and opinion for her personal growth/ her individual better result.
However, in addition to dealing with so many labels all she has as a strongest support is her inner voice for everything, it gives her a power to choose to speak out loud a true feeling. it gives her fire to not give attention to baseless bully battles or worthless judgements as her passion, her opinion , her voice, don't allow her to entertain dis-values. Her voice, her opinion is the one which makes her odd in all this even. Unfortunately, today she is standing in a phase where she doubts on her voice to speak it out loud or keep it with herself only.
Her self-doubt made a greedy her so restless, this whole situation felts so wrong to her, for her, for a people like her, for a youth who are confident enough to have their own opinions and have a courage as well to speak that out in front of the next person no matter s/he is equivalent or superior. Her heart and her mind was on a battle of thoughts that every opinion deserves a good welcoming approach and a healthy debate, instead of a rude , competitive or humorous response.
She closed her eyes(Krishna) and a confused her started realising that her silence will result in her loss and win for unworthy either a thing or a people and she can't accept silence over principles , faith and truth. Because at the end it is not about end result, but it is about, more thoughts, more understandings, more learning, more viewpoints, more knowledge, more equivalent chances , more justice, more alternatives, more satisfaction, more involvements, more transparency and on top of all this more best and neutral result.
So, believing in that her world is not limited to only such closed minded people, She decided not to change herself according to her surroundings. And instead of that she will focus on doing what she feels is right, what she needs to do , what makes her more confident. She will not let her curiosity / voice / opinion / Dream to be killed by not speaking out her voice.
And she won over her phase that now she clearly knows why opinion matters, voice matters. But more important than this is - winning even in a bad surroundings / environment is more than individual's win.
To be continued... (Part 2: Come up with solution)
By - Darshini Shah
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